Exclusion of Symbiosis

Take charge of my destiny, or let it be decided by others?
Identity denied
Its ok, I’ve tired of dubious pursuits
Think for me because you think you know better
Eliminate choice because you think you know better

Disapointed when I’m not happy
Deny me the world so I can not feel
Blame me for the dispair you feel
Resent me for my inner torment

Conform me into a mold I can’t habituate
Compel me to be something I’m not
Impose your will over mine
Defeated when I can’t meet your expectations

My destiny is not yours to chose
Individuality restored
I’ve tired of your dubious pursuits
Think for myself because you dont know better
Taking flight, symbiosis destroyed

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Fear and Blindness

I use to look to you
For everything
You were my life, my focus
I gave you all I had
And some things I didn’t

But you showed what it was worth to you.

Blinded by words
Held back by fear
Living a lie
Just to make someone happy

But I no longer need you
For anything
I dont need you, no longer my focus
I now give you nothing
And take back what I need

I know what I am worth

No longer blind
No longer in fear
Living my life
To make myself happy

I do not need to look to you
For anything
I have my life and things to focus on
I have everything I need
And some of the things I want

I am worth more than what you valued in me

No longer blind
Fear is a memory
It’s my life
I can be happy without you.

Creative Side of Negativity

Do not take this as something to worry about. This is more for creative purposes and may end up in something I make. Its a combination of feelings I’m still working through. Know that I am okay or will be. I have had lots of support and love from good friends and family.

Anguish is a constant companion
Not much solace in sleep
My happiness left when they did.

My foundation has crumbled.
My sanctuary destroyed
My soul withering

What disguise will I wear today?
Is there a difference between myself and the facade.
A perpetual aberration

Masking the anguish
A facade for others sake
Refusing the display of my soul