Appreciate the Small Things

It has been a very long time since I’ve just sat and enjoyed music.  Didn’t realize it until I stopped listening/reading the streams of consciousness on social media.  As much as I love to keep up with people, there is much value in taking time to unplug.

I have always liked The Luna Sequence.  Her music is amazing and I always forget to listen to her other albums.  Right now I am really digging the song Parallels on the album This Is Bloodlust.  She has no lyrics in any of her compilations that I know of.  This one is no different.  A perfect example of how raw emotion can be captured in sound.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alBZiXHYuG0  if you care to give it a listen.

I started looking for new music again because I have needed and wanted to make my own again, but lacked the motivation and drive to.  Some music makes me see a reflection of how far I have yet to go.  Kind of discouraging.  Then I hear stuff like this that is only slightly beyond my current talent, but I see how the song was put together.  I see hope, I see my own vision.  I suddenly feel its not always an uphill battle and that the goals are achievable.

It’s times like these I can feel good about myself instead of the bad that surrounds conversations lately.  Not that it’s bad for people to express negativity.  It’s a part of life we can not avoid.  I am there for my friends, but in taking all that and listening, it becomes a part of me.  I feel their hurt.  Perhaps I am being too empathetic?  I don’t know how else to be.  Its how I both understand and relate.  I don’t just listen, I feel.  If you cry on my shoulder, I may cry with you.

I love being able to do that.  I want to be there for everyone.  When my own life gives me social and emotional challenges, that strength is sapped quickly.  When others I love are attacked, I want to attack right back.  I fight more for others than I ever would for myself.  That right there sounds funny to me.  I’m not trying to be a hero, I just hate seeing others suffer.  I can hide my own suffering.  But to see someone else’s, especially if its someone I care about, hurts me deeply.

I want to continue helping if I can, to be there for others.  Lately I just feel weaker emotionally than before.  Some things I just can’t seem to cope with like before.  I am not sadder or more depressed.  But I do feel those feelings much more intensely.  Luckily, as the wind blows, the weather changes quickly.  Sometimes it just takes the right conditions to make it rain or shine.

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